I think that breaking up with Colton even though I didn't want to at the time, is in fact EXACTLY what I wanted. While he was a good guy at first, their were things about him I just couldn't stand. The best advice I've ever received was from my Grandma and she always says "If the good out weighs the bad, get the fuck out" and I'm glad that I did just that. I have my whole life ahead of me to be married and boring, I need to have fun right now while I still can so that when I get older I'm not a cynic like my Uncle or so I don't settle and become miserable like my Mother. I want to know that the gut I marry is the right guy forever, and not just right now and luckily I knew that Colton was just the guy for right then and not the gut i want to spend forever with. But at the same time, we could have been great together. Oh well, I will find someone that encompasses all of the things I'm looking for in a man and not just a few here and there. I want a man, not a boy posing as one. And I know I will find that man, so until then I am perfectly content with being single and playing out all of my options.
So, with that said, I really want to get the specialists raise at work. I think that it would give me the opportunity to grow with the company and learn a new trade while at the same time completely proving that I am where I need to be. I want to do this, to grow myself and with this job. And I know I can. I just need the first step. (: I will keep myself motivated and in charge of my own destiny. 2012 is the year of 'power' I have the power to make the sacrifice and I have the power to be my change. I will get the job, I will have the power. I will win this race. Positive energy is what I'm thinking. (:
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